Turning Point

“The day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”

Anais Nin

I can't do this anymore.  I know I've said this a thousand times, but I can't. 

I need to get my life moving again. 

I am riven with anxiety and I need to let it go. 

I am tense as a board.  I need to move my body.

My guts and my skin are a mess. I need to eat in a way that is respectful and energising to my body.

I need to be writing again.  Gods, I need this sooo much.

I need to set boundaries.  In my mind and in my life.  Give myself space to be me. 

I need to learn to manage the commitments I do have to make in a healthier way.

Right now, I hurt all over.  I am angry and resentful.  I am so exhausted I can barely concentrate on the next word, never mind the next sentence.

A friend emailed me this morning.  She said 'I am drinking lots of veggie juices, taking superfood power, napping every afternoon, and I feel much better.'  And I thought: 'Can you send me your programme please, because thats just what I need too.'

I've been through a lot in the last month, emotionally and physically.  A real Dark Night of the Soul.  I need a break.  A big one.  Its time to give myself that gift.